You gently caress the bannister. It's smooth, and inviting..
What am I even doing here?
There's no reason to any of this.
If you really think about it opposites are pretty similar.
im super excited for this final battle you guys\\im so hyped you wouldnt even believe me if i told you\\how really super excited i was about it
Happiness' Essence Lives Largely Over People,\\Enemies Not Granted Ultimate Intelligence?\\Neutralized.
H E L L O P E N G U I N
You've got very nice pores.
HAHA THIS ONE KIND OF LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING LEWD
[this is a save point]
Something is scratched onto the floor.\\"FOR A GOOD TIME, CALL 565-PENG".
There is a button here.
The steps are made of the same thing everything else in the room is.\\Rocks.
There's a lot of air right here.\\In fact, you estimate there might be enough air to fill the entire room.
You regard the steps with the utmost of care.
After carefully surveying the floor,\\you determine that Penguin is still not in this room...
Shplitz was here.
The brave and default system is really fun,\\but we're not good enough for that.
Time is an illusion, but is happiness an allusion?\\Perhaps Penguin will have the answer.
You stare.
Made in Penguin
This pillar is pretty nice\\You'd rate it like, at least in your top 23 best pillars of all time\\OF ALL TIME.
The floor asks you to please stop examining it, it's had a hard day\\and does not need you judging it right now.
The floor tiles here are firm, yet inviting. Chiselled by the hands\\of penguin master stonecutters a millenia ago, they capture the\\rugged charm of the age. A thin veil of dust offsets the cerulean\\hue of the stone\\with subtle elegance.
There are a handful of pebbles on the ground\\You arrange them in order from smallest to largest.
You hear a whisper in the wind... "DRINK MORE OVALTINE"...
http://gyazo.com/f9764651a5115c2ded94f0130dcb85a0
I found a 4 legged clover, I'm giving it to you.
Well, you know, steps.
I'm not really sure what you expect to find here.
Don't let me down
You step on the floor tile. It screams.
The craftsmanship on this pillar is clearly the work of an amateur\\Who taught this guy how to carve a cylinder,\\Michael J. Fox?
You lick the wall. It tastes like the sweet musk of Penguin.
You flatten yourself up against the wall and pretend like\\you're a sneaky spy on a top secret mission\\It's pretty fun until you remember that you have\\to go save the world from the wrath of Penguin reborn.
It's really cool that each of these tiles\\has something different written on each one.
Pressing your ear to the ground,\\you hear the faint sound of kittens battling in the dungeon below.
Hey there beautiful.
I could walk on this specific tile all day.
Can you get tattoos on your bones?
Wow! Hello Penguin 2 is finally out! can you belive it?
This tile vibrates at a disturbingly low frequency.
No, really though.  Think about it.\\A grilled cheese sandwich, dipped in chocolate would be pretty amazing.\\I mean, you'd have to blast-chill the chocolate coating to harden it up\\while also preserving the gooey cheese core,\\but I feel the challenge only makes it all the more alluring.
Keep following your star, and some day YOU'll be the moon ~~~
You can kind of make out a face in one of the floor tiles.
There is a small bug on the ground. You watch it crawl around,\\exploring its miniscule world.\\Do bugs dream? Do they also share a piece of Penguin's consciousness,\\as all men do?
You stare at the ground. It's made of ground.
You lift a wobbly rock in the floor to reveal a hidden treasure chest!\\However, you lack a LOCKPICK with which to open it,\\so you put it back where it was.
Ropeburn is a serious problem.
You pick your nose and covertly wipe it on a crevasse in the brickwork.
You're surprised to discover that the wall here is, in fact,\\the same as the wall everywhere else in the room.
Upon thorough investigation,\\you conclude that this is indeed a patch of empty floor.
This pattern is a little annoying.
Reduce your sodium intake.
I can't believe you would read my diary.
Minecraft got worse.
A song is written on this tile.\\Too bad you don't have an instrument to play it with.
The best type is a dead one.
The tile feels smooth on your body.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/!
Say Hello....
Konami Code
I am a breeze.
There is a ghost here.
The tile beneath you becomes a light absorbing square of black.\\You fall into it forever,\\memories of your childhood and adventures screaming by.\\The torment of things lost and desicions made poorly itch at your skull,\\causing a pain that you aren't sure is either physical or mental.\\Then you land back on the little square tile,\\and continue reading the rest of the descriptions of the floor tiles.
This shade of purple is actually kinda nice.
I want to go home.
Every Good Boy Deserves FACE
This particular tile seems almost inviting.\\You reach your hand forward to embrace it,\\then quickly draw back remembering events of the past.
You think about sausage.
What do you mean?!  She's right here!  Can't you see her?!
;)
This tile is terrified.
why are you doing this.
This tile is at a little bit of an angle.
If you eat a sucker for too long your mouth will start to hurt.
Enjoy your clothes.
Why the face?
I don't think Cameron will appreciate that.
Tile number 38 is having a bad day it seems.
Hey look an orange.
You push one of the stones in the wall. It wobbles a bit.\\For being the Grand Temple of Peng,\\the build quality around here is really shit.
Woah, it's like two walls intersecting.
This tile reminds you of your urge to eat.
This arrangement of tiles causes you to reflect on your childhood.\\Hard and jagged.
I miss dom.
hold on stupid bullshit
Hello Floor Tile
I can't believe you would say that to me
Hair wins!
If you burn down the trees with gasoline, the money up.
This tile isn't special and neither are you.
This wall has a very punchable face.
You feel something brush against your leg,\\but when you look down there's nothing here.
You feel the skeleton within you shifting..
VIDEO GAMES, AM I RIGHT ????
Look, whatever you do,\\don't examine the tile directly to the right of this one ok??
You fuck, I trusted you.
butt